Monday, April 4, 2016

Food Dreams

I find that the most common dream for me now involves food. Always over eating, and always eating things I really should not be eating. I have had 3 very vivid food dreams. The first one was while I was still in the hospital and I can not recall what it was I was eating. The second one was a dream involving people I knew in high school and since no one knew I have had surgery I ordered and eat a large pizza by myself. The last one was at work and I sneaked in 3 doughnuts, even hiding in the bathroom so I could eat it without being caught.

Outside of my dreams I have had cravings to eat. While putting away the cheese from my wife and daughters lunch I had a huge urge to eat a piece of cheese. I even in my mind worked out how it would be perfectly fine for me to do this. When I am around food that smells good I can almost taste it in my mouth.

How do I deal with this?  The dreams I assume with be a part of me for awhile as my mind gets used to not being able to have what ever I want whenever I want. The eating any food around me part will be harder. Certainly I will not be able to fit as much in as before but I still will need to keep this in check somehow.

I plan to make an appointment to talk to the psychiatrist that I talked to pre-surgery. I think I really have much to work through with gratification, and eating my feelings. I will need to find a new way to relieve stress, a new way to think about food, and a new way to be happy or sad without food. Food is ever present, and I cannot stop eating.

On an ironic note right now while writing this I am watching Chopped on the Food Network and filling completely stuffed after eating a sugar free Jello Cup. Maybe I am going to need to find new things to watch on TV also.


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