Key Stats: all BGs normal, 4 shakes 1 bar no off eating. 20 minute ride, 30 minute walk.
So first I lost nearly 7 pounds this week. This far into the program the weight loss should be slowing down a bit more but this was one of my bigger weeks since I started. I am proud of the hard work I have done, and the results I have earned because of that.
In class today we talked about food quite a bit, and eating habits. I admitted in class that I am truly afraid of food. I am worried that while I am learning a lot about myself that I will just go back to my old habits. I don't want to gain back the weight that I have lost. So how do I start to eat again? I want to stay on the shakes for as long as I can. The further I get away from the food I used to eat, the more I think I can avoid going back to them. I have always told people that the shakes are the easy part of this. Life after is going to be the hard part. I wish I could just type what I type at the end of every blog post, that I know I can do this; but I would be lying if I said that right now. I am worried about doing that. I have 30 years of unhealthy eating habits to get past. I know I will put the work in. I know I am putting the work in. Can I figure this out, will I let slip ups become set backs? I have not seen much of the transition plan yet, but I hope the transition plan gives me the tools I need to bring food back in. I know I will be 100% in, and if that is enough- well then I can do this.
-Jon
Thursday, April 18, 2013
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Hitting 260 (day 62)
Key Stats: All BG's normal. 4 shakes, 1 bar no off eating. 20 minutes on the bike.
Today turned into kind of an off day for exercise. I got very little sleep last night due to my son getting up throughout the night, and I know tonight is going to be more of the same. While my ability to exercise has gotten much better than it was, but I still worry about burn out.
This morning when I stepped on the scale I got greeted by a great number. I number I have worked hard for, and a number I have earned. I got to see 260. Sure it was 260.8 so if we are rounding it is 261, but forget that I truncated it. Than means 95 pounds gone since I first recorded my weight. That means 74 pounds since this recent try to lose weight started. That also means I am getting into the 250's shortly- which is my lowest weight ever as an adult. 62 days in, and a life time to go.
I need to find an active hobby. I get 30+ views on my blog every day now, does anyone have recommendations. Has anyone who is reading this gone from a non-active life to a active life? What worked for you? Why did it work? Biking sounds like a great thing to get into, but the costs of buying a bike scare me. I don't want to get the wrong bike after all.
Tomorrow is official weigh in day. Again I am looking forward to both the class and getting to record my official weight loss number. I also have a lot to learn, and the class does a great job of teaching. Like I said above, I have a life time to go still. I can do this.
-Jon
Today turned into kind of an off day for exercise. I got very little sleep last night due to my son getting up throughout the night, and I know tonight is going to be more of the same. While my ability to exercise has gotten much better than it was, but I still worry about burn out.
This morning when I stepped on the scale I got greeted by a great number. I number I have worked hard for, and a number I have earned. I got to see 260. Sure it was 260.8 so if we are rounding it is 261, but forget that I truncated it. Than means 95 pounds gone since I first recorded my weight. That means 74 pounds since this recent try to lose weight started. That also means I am getting into the 250's shortly- which is my lowest weight ever as an adult. 62 days in, and a life time to go.
I need to find an active hobby. I get 30+ views on my blog every day now, does anyone have recommendations. Has anyone who is reading this gone from a non-active life to a active life? What worked for you? Why did it work? Biking sounds like a great thing to get into, but the costs of buying a bike scare me. I don't want to get the wrong bike after all.
Tomorrow is official weigh in day. Again I am looking forward to both the class and getting to record my official weight loss number. I also have a lot to learn, and the class does a great job of teaching. Like I said above, I have a life time to go still. I can do this.
-Jon
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Inspiration (day 61)
Key Stats: All BG's normal. 4 shakes 1 bar, no off eating. 20 minute on the bike, and 30 minutes of swimming.
I am not going to take full credit for all of this, but I know of one person who has started the VLCD program because of me, and today I had another person reach out and ask about the program and more information. That means because people are seeing how much good I am doing for myself and thinking they can do it to. I am an inspiration. That feels really good. To top that off today I went to lunch with two friends that I have not seen since before I started to lose weight. My friends where shocked by how much I had changed. Seeing people notice the amount of change I have gone through makes me really happy. It just isn't enough for me to see the changes in the mirror, or feeling the clothes get loser doesn't feel real; but people who don't know that I am trying notice it makes it feel real.
Maybe that is part of the problem that I have. When I was over weight I would look in the mirror and see a normal weight person. I would see the fat person in pictures when I would look at them, but the mirror not at all. Now when I look in the mirror I still see a fat person, but I see a skinny person in pictures. I'll need to find a way to see the real me in the mirror. Or just look at more pictures of myself I guess.
The pool keeps getting easier. My energy level is higher than I can remember it ever being. I am still sore quiet often from years of letting my muscles do nothing. But that is getting better. It is not a popular thought with my wife, but the thought of running keeps coming to my mind. I think just doing a 5k one time in my life would feel like such an accomplishment. I'll keep that thought to the back of my mind for awhile though. I am really making progress and I am really doing good. I know that I can do this.
-Jon
I am not going to take full credit for all of this, but I know of one person who has started the VLCD program because of me, and today I had another person reach out and ask about the program and more information. That means because people are seeing how much good I am doing for myself and thinking they can do it to. I am an inspiration. That feels really good. To top that off today I went to lunch with two friends that I have not seen since before I started to lose weight. My friends where shocked by how much I had changed. Seeing people notice the amount of change I have gone through makes me really happy. It just isn't enough for me to see the changes in the mirror, or feeling the clothes get loser doesn't feel real; but people who don't know that I am trying notice it makes it feel real.
Maybe that is part of the problem that I have. When I was over weight I would look in the mirror and see a normal weight person. I would see the fat person in pictures when I would look at them, but the mirror not at all. Now when I look in the mirror I still see a fat person, but I see a skinny person in pictures. I'll need to find a way to see the real me in the mirror. Or just look at more pictures of myself I guess.
The pool keeps getting easier. My energy level is higher than I can remember it ever being. I am still sore quiet often from years of letting my muscles do nothing. But that is getting better. It is not a popular thought with my wife, but the thought of running keeps coming to my mind. I think just doing a 5k one time in my life would feel like such an accomplishment. I'll keep that thought to the back of my mind for awhile though. I am really making progress and I am really doing good. I know that I can do this.
-Jon
Monday, April 15, 2013
2 full months (day 60)
Key Stats: All BG's normal. 4 shakes, 1 bar no off eating. 20 minutes on the bike, and a 20 minute walk.
I have been at this now for 2 months. At least if you count a month as 30 days. I think it is good at this point to look at how far I have gone in that short of a time.
1.) I have lost 66 pounds.
2.) I have come within 11 pounds of my initial goal of 260.
3.) I have not eaten off a single time.
4.) I have gone far down the road to make exercise part of my life.
5.) None of my clothes fit, and even clothes I purchased a month ago no longer fit.
6.) I have more energy than I can remember having.
7.) I have stuck to writing my blog posting and examining myself.
8.) I have found out that I can resist temptation- something I didn't know was in me.
I was going for 10, but ended up with 8. I am ok with that though, that is a huge list even if it is 2 short of 10.
Oddly enough today was a day when I found cravings showing up again. While I was out shopping at the grocery store tonight I found myself really thinking about eating off. While at work today I couldn't stop thinking about the block of cheese in the fridge at home. Funny how those thoughts brought on what felt like physical hunger. I would have eaten in the past. I would have finished that entire block of cheese. I would have gotten the gummy worms I wanted. I even had to stop and smell the gummy worms at the store. I can just imagine what that looked like to people walking by. I still look like a fat guy, so they saw a fat guy smelling candy in a store. I am sure I would tell that story to people if I saw that, but I am fine with it. I dealt with my craving in a healthy way.
Getting through these 60 days, and days like today prove to me that I am doing what I need to do. That I have strength I never thought I had. I can keep doing this, and keep figuring out what I need to figure out in order to fix this. I can do this.
-Jon
I have been at this now for 2 months. At least if you count a month as 30 days. I think it is good at this point to look at how far I have gone in that short of a time.
1.) I have lost 66 pounds.
2.) I have come within 11 pounds of my initial goal of 260.
3.) I have not eaten off a single time.
4.) I have gone far down the road to make exercise part of my life.
5.) None of my clothes fit, and even clothes I purchased a month ago no longer fit.
6.) I have more energy than I can remember having.
7.) I have stuck to writing my blog posting and examining myself.
8.) I have found out that I can resist temptation- something I didn't know was in me.
I was going for 10, but ended up with 8. I am ok with that though, that is a huge list even if it is 2 short of 10.
Oddly enough today was a day when I found cravings showing up again. While I was out shopping at the grocery store tonight I found myself really thinking about eating off. While at work today I couldn't stop thinking about the block of cheese in the fridge at home. Funny how those thoughts brought on what felt like physical hunger. I would have eaten in the past. I would have finished that entire block of cheese. I would have gotten the gummy worms I wanted. I even had to stop and smell the gummy worms at the store. I can just imagine what that looked like to people walking by. I still look like a fat guy, so they saw a fat guy smelling candy in a store. I am sure I would tell that story to people if I saw that, but I am fine with it. I dealt with my craving in a healthy way.
Getting through these 60 days, and days like today prove to me that I am doing what I need to do. That I have strength I never thought I had. I can keep doing this, and keep figuring out what I need to figure out in order to fix this. I can do this.
-Jon
Sunday, April 14, 2013
Over doing it just a bit (day 59)
Key Stats: No BG checks. 4 shakes, 1 bar no off eating. No formal exercise.
So I did over do it in the pool yesterday. I have had sore legs and arms all day. I don't like feeling this sore, but I know I have to keep pushing starting tomorrow. I'll have to go a bit lighter, but I can't stop just because I am a bit sore. Next time I will try to remember to not push it.
I have not kept a detailed log of measurements, but I do check things from time to time. My neck is now down to 19 inches. This allows me to shop for dress shirts without having to first find the big and tall section. To prove it I tried on the dress shirt I purchased for my Vegas trip back in the 2nd week of March (just a hair over a month ago). That shirt was a 19. At the time I needed two half inch button extenders to be able to button the neck. Today, I could button it no problem. So 1 month in I have lost an inch off of my neck. Bolstered by that and having time to kill while getting an oil change at Farm and Fleet I decided to try on some clothes to see what I fit in. My starting size was a 44/30 pants and a 3XLT shirt. I needed the tall part to help from the shirt showing my stomach off when I lifted my arms, not because I was tall. Both the pants and the shirts were honestly getting a bit tight on me, and I really could have moved up to the next size in both. Today what fit was 38/30 pants and a XL shirt. So 6 inches gone from where I wear my pants (which my wife always reminds me is not my waist, and 2 shirt sizes down. Now to be honest the shirt was a bit more snug that I would normally buy. But I thought I looked good in it. Maybe that brand of shirt XL was a bit too snug, but that means there are likely other brands that and XL would be a good fit. I wonder if I will get to the point where I can wear just a Large? How small will my neck get? I look forward to finding out. Here is the picture I took of myself. This just makes me so proud to see myself looking good. It is moments like today in that dressing room that really affirm for me that I can do this. -Jon
So I did over do it in the pool yesterday. I have had sore legs and arms all day. I don't like feeling this sore, but I know I have to keep pushing starting tomorrow. I'll have to go a bit lighter, but I can't stop just because I am a bit sore. Next time I will try to remember to not push it.
I have not kept a detailed log of measurements, but I do check things from time to time. My neck is now down to 19 inches. This allows me to shop for dress shirts without having to first find the big and tall section. To prove it I tried on the dress shirt I purchased for my Vegas trip back in the 2nd week of March (just a hair over a month ago). That shirt was a 19. At the time I needed two half inch button extenders to be able to button the neck. Today, I could button it no problem. So 1 month in I have lost an inch off of my neck. Bolstered by that and having time to kill while getting an oil change at Farm and Fleet I decided to try on some clothes to see what I fit in. My starting size was a 44/30 pants and a 3XLT shirt. I needed the tall part to help from the shirt showing my stomach off when I lifted my arms, not because I was tall. Both the pants and the shirts were honestly getting a bit tight on me, and I really could have moved up to the next size in both. Today what fit was 38/30 pants and a XL shirt. So 6 inches gone from where I wear my pants (which my wife always reminds me is not my waist, and 2 shirt sizes down. Now to be honest the shirt was a bit more snug that I would normally buy. But I thought I looked good in it. Maybe that brand of shirt XL was a bit too snug, but that means there are likely other brands that and XL would be a good fit. I wonder if I will get to the point where I can wear just a Large? How small will my neck get? I look forward to finding out. Here is the picture I took of myself. This just makes me so proud to see myself looking good. It is moments like today in that dressing room that really affirm for me that I can do this. -Jon
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Standing on the slippery slope (day 58)
Key Stats: No BG checks (meter at work), 4 shakes 1 bar, no off eating. 45 minutes in the pool.
Today I went with my son to a birthday party. It was a prince/princess party for a little 3 year old girl. The mom of the girl hosting the party went all out. Decorations, games, costumes and food. Dear lord the food. Many of my favorite treats and cravings. I knew it was going to be that, which is why it was important that I went.
I get to live in the bubble right now. I feel no hunger, and I have a very strict plan to follow. So parties like these are really not all that hard to go to. Sure I have to deal with the temptation, but saying no is fairly easy. Once I am off the program, things get much harder. Once out of the bubble and not having a strict plan I have to figure out how to eat at events like this. So I scanned the food looking at what I would take. Instead of saying some foods are bad, or some foods are good I look at portions. I had the plate I would have taken all mapped out. There was lots of treats, but there was a good balance of "good" food also. Off the plan today would have been a not great eating day, but I will have those. It is keeping things in balance that counts. I am glad to be learning that. Also at the end of the day I am proud of myself for today. I certainly could have eaten off, I could have had any of the food and most likely would not have even been noticed. I didn't though. I don't have to indulge just because the food is there, I never knew I could do that before. That is why it is important to stand on the slope some times and look down. You can see where you could be going, and know you don't have to. Today taught me how far I have come in just a short 58 days. Today re-affirmed for me that I can do this.
-Jon
Today I went with my son to a birthday party. It was a prince/princess party for a little 3 year old girl. The mom of the girl hosting the party went all out. Decorations, games, costumes and food. Dear lord the food. Many of my favorite treats and cravings. I knew it was going to be that, which is why it was important that I went.
I get to live in the bubble right now. I feel no hunger, and I have a very strict plan to follow. So parties like these are really not all that hard to go to. Sure I have to deal with the temptation, but saying no is fairly easy. Once I am off the program, things get much harder. Once out of the bubble and not having a strict plan I have to figure out how to eat at events like this. So I scanned the food looking at what I would take. Instead of saying some foods are bad, or some foods are good I look at portions. I had the plate I would have taken all mapped out. There was lots of treats, but there was a good balance of "good" food also. Off the plan today would have been a not great eating day, but I will have those. It is keeping things in balance that counts. I am glad to be learning that. Also at the end of the day I am proud of myself for today. I certainly could have eaten off, I could have had any of the food and most likely would not have even been noticed. I didn't though. I don't have to indulge just because the food is there, I never knew I could do that before. That is why it is important to stand on the slope some times and look down. You can see where you could be going, and know you don't have to. Today taught me how far I have come in just a short 58 days. Today re-affirmed for me that I can do this.
-Jon
Friday, April 12, 2013
Over half way to my goal (day 57)
Key Stats: All BG's normal. 4 shakes 1 bar no off eating. 20 minutes on the bike in the morning.
Today marked 3 days in a row of not getting much sleep. Between the storms, and my son waking early I have been not getting as much sleep as I would like. I hope he doesn't get up at 4:30 in the morning again. So this will be a short post, I want to get to bed as soon as I can.
I noticed today that I am really well over the half way mark for my weight loss goal. I am down 66 pounds and I have 36 pounds to go. When I started 260 seemed like a pipe dream, and now I worry that I won't get a full 6 months on shakes. I really want as long as a time as possible away from food. I really want that food reset button that I know takes a long time to start working. I have to completely change how I used to eat, expand my food choices and get rid of the emotional tie to eating. It is getting better, but I worry that I have a long ways to go. Each day away from food weakens the bond to food. Even if I don't get the full 6 months I know that I can find a way, I truly know that I can do this.
-Jon
Today marked 3 days in a row of not getting much sleep. Between the storms, and my son waking early I have been not getting as much sleep as I would like. I hope he doesn't get up at 4:30 in the morning again. So this will be a short post, I want to get to bed as soon as I can.
I noticed today that I am really well over the half way mark for my weight loss goal. I am down 66 pounds and I have 36 pounds to go. When I started 260 seemed like a pipe dream, and now I worry that I won't get a full 6 months on shakes. I really want as long as a time as possible away from food. I really want that food reset button that I know takes a long time to start working. I have to completely change how I used to eat, expand my food choices and get rid of the emotional tie to eating. It is getting better, but I worry that I have a long ways to go. Each day away from food weakens the bond to food. Even if I don't get the full 6 months I know that I can find a way, I truly know that I can do this.
-Jon
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