It has been awhile since I wrote in this blog, well a few days at least. I have decided to change the focus of what I write here and I have been trying to figure out what that focus should be. It will certainly have to do with my healthy eating- which is going great. It will also certainly have to do with my exercise, and my goal of completing some race type event. However it is just not the daily struggle that full VLCD was any more. I just don't have something to write every day. So I guess this is my transition blog post- it is fitting since I am in transition right now for the VLCD program.
Thank you to every who has read or is reading. Thanks to everyone who has supported me while in the shakes and bars portion of this journey. I'll need more support in the future. But writing this blog, and going through the journey I have gone through has taught me that most important lesson that I needed in life- I can do this.
-Jon
Showing posts with label winning. Show all posts
Showing posts with label winning. Show all posts
Saturday, June 15, 2013
Friday, May 3, 2013
A delayed post (day 77)
Key Stats: All BG's normal. 4 shakes 1 bar no off eating. 20 minutes on the treadmill.
I think the lack of sleep while on the road is catching up with me. I never sleep well on the road and this trip has been no exception. I went to exercise last night and for lack of a better term "bonked". I couldn't get much running in, so I just walked for most of the time. And I didn't get the blog written last night like I should have I just wanted to go to sleep.
This would have been a big eating day for me in the past. I felt hungry nearly all night. I think lack of energy is another eating trigger for me. I am glad to go through days like yesterday though, it lets me examine all sorts of different triggers. Dealing with the triggers inside of this ketosis bubble should give me tools to deal with them outside of the bubble.... I hope. No I hope is not right, it has to give me the tools- I know.
I am looking forward to getting home, even if it is going to be a long day for me to get home. Tomorrow I get to take my son to swimming lessons, get to kiss my wife (and take the single parent load off of her shoulders), and get back to my routine. I can not recommend enough for anyone who wants to do a VLCD diet- be boring. Get into a routine, add the exercise on day one, and do not deviate. It makes this plan so much easier. And for me it lets me really identify the triggers that come when I get off of routine. I never thought I could do something like this. I thought I would fall apart the first time I had to deal with temptation- just like I had every other time. But I am doing it and learning so much about myself. If I can do this- and I can - you can do this too.
-Jon
I think the lack of sleep while on the road is catching up with me. I never sleep well on the road and this trip has been no exception. I went to exercise last night and for lack of a better term "bonked". I couldn't get much running in, so I just walked for most of the time. And I didn't get the blog written last night like I should have I just wanted to go to sleep.
This would have been a big eating day for me in the past. I felt hungry nearly all night. I think lack of energy is another eating trigger for me. I am glad to go through days like yesterday though, it lets me examine all sorts of different triggers. Dealing with the triggers inside of this ketosis bubble should give me tools to deal with them outside of the bubble.... I hope. No I hope is not right, it has to give me the tools- I know.
I am looking forward to getting home, even if it is going to be a long day for me to get home. Tomorrow I get to take my son to swimming lessons, get to kiss my wife (and take the single parent load off of her shoulders), and get back to my routine. I can not recommend enough for anyone who wants to do a VLCD diet- be boring. Get into a routine, add the exercise on day one, and do not deviate. It makes this plan so much easier. And for me it lets me really identify the triggers that come when I get off of routine. I never thought I could do something like this. I thought I would fall apart the first time I had to deal with temptation- just like I had every other time. But I am doing it and learning so much about myself. If I can do this- and I can - you can do this too.
-Jon
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
Stress triggers (day 76)
Key Stats: All BG's normal. 4 shakes 1 bar no off eating. 30 minutes on the bike.
I found out today that instead of coming home tomorrow or even Friday I am going to be stuck on the road until the weekend. That puts a ton of stress on my home life. It puts a ton of stress on my wife who has to be home alone with our son. I have to be away from my son and my wife. And it triggered hunger. Hunger like I have not had to deal with in a long time. I didn't eat off but I hated having to fight it. I guess learning to fight unneeded hunger is a big lesson so I should count this as a win really.
So why didn't I eat? Well I have accomplished a lot so far, and I am not going to let crappy news sink my progress. I am trying so hard to let real hunger dictate when I eat. Every time i resist head hunger I get stronger. And today made me stronger. Of course I didn't feel strong when it was going on. But I did it. If I can win today, I can win tomorrow. If I can not let stress dictate my eating today, I can do the same tomorrow. I can do this.
-Jon
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Making exercise part of my life (day 73)
Key Stats: All BG's normal. 4 shakes 1 bar no off eating. 45 minute bike ride (7.8 miles)
My family had a lot to do today. It would normally be a swim day for me, but because of plans in the afternoon that was just not going to work out. So I sat down and talked it out with my wife for how to fit my exercise in today. It is hard being a good husband and a good father, while also working on being active every day. Sure I did the grocery shopping (and I volunteer to do that just so I get to walking in while doing it. When I go by myself I walk every isle just to get in more walking), but I really like getting in the "real" exercise. So we figured out that biking could fit in during my son's nap. But we had to fit it in. This is going to be hard to maintain. It was easy at first, my family just fit life around me starting to lose weight.. but I can't expect that to happen forever. At some point I have to find a way to fit the exercise around my family. But what order of importance do I put it? How much should I expect my family to work around what I need to do for myself? Is it unreasonable to take 60 minutes each day as I have set as my goal?
On similar note I really love getting out on my bike. I took a longer ride today than I have taken before. I also tackled a HUGE hill. I loved it. The rush of going downhill, the pride in going up that big hill. Getting to see parts of the city I have not seen before. I can not wait until I have save up enough money to get a good bike to go out on. I can not wait until I can ride for hours at a time (see above for fitting it in). I want to do a long distance ride. I certainly need a few parts of my body to toughen up first though... my legs and butt are sore today. But it is that good kind of sore. Pain is just weakness leaving the body. That is what my company commander used to tell us. I can't remember what movie he got it from, but I heard it all the time. I am shocked at myself, enjoying exercise. Sure I did it at the beginning because I had to- but I really do enjoy it now. I did not think that I had that in me. I can do this.
-Jon
My family had a lot to do today. It would normally be a swim day for me, but because of plans in the afternoon that was just not going to work out. So I sat down and talked it out with my wife for how to fit my exercise in today. It is hard being a good husband and a good father, while also working on being active every day. Sure I did the grocery shopping (and I volunteer to do that just so I get to walking in while doing it. When I go by myself I walk every isle just to get in more walking), but I really like getting in the "real" exercise. So we figured out that biking could fit in during my son's nap. But we had to fit it in. This is going to be hard to maintain. It was easy at first, my family just fit life around me starting to lose weight.. but I can't expect that to happen forever. At some point I have to find a way to fit the exercise around my family. But what order of importance do I put it? How much should I expect my family to work around what I need to do for myself? Is it unreasonable to take 60 minutes each day as I have set as my goal?
On similar note I really love getting out on my bike. I took a longer ride today than I have taken before. I also tackled a HUGE hill. I loved it. The rush of going downhill, the pride in going up that big hill. Getting to see parts of the city I have not seen before. I can not wait until I have save up enough money to get a good bike to go out on. I can not wait until I can ride for hours at a time (see above for fitting it in). I want to do a long distance ride. I certainly need a few parts of my body to toughen up first though... my legs and butt are sore today. But it is that good kind of sore. Pain is just weakness leaving the body. That is what my company commander used to tell us. I can't remember what movie he got it from, but I heard it all the time. I am shocked at myself, enjoying exercise. Sure I did it at the beginning because I had to- but I really do enjoy it now. I did not think that I had that in me. I can do this.
-Jon
Monday, April 15, 2013
2 full months (day 60)
Key Stats: All BG's normal. 4 shakes, 1 bar no off eating. 20 minutes on the bike, and a 20 minute walk.
I have been at this now for 2 months. At least if you count a month as 30 days. I think it is good at this point to look at how far I have gone in that short of a time.
1.) I have lost 66 pounds.
2.) I have come within 11 pounds of my initial goal of 260.
3.) I have not eaten off a single time.
4.) I have gone far down the road to make exercise part of my life.
5.) None of my clothes fit, and even clothes I purchased a month ago no longer fit.
6.) I have more energy than I can remember having.
7.) I have stuck to writing my blog posting and examining myself.
8.) I have found out that I can resist temptation- something I didn't know was in me.
I was going for 10, but ended up with 8. I am ok with that though, that is a huge list even if it is 2 short of 10.
Oddly enough today was a day when I found cravings showing up again. While I was out shopping at the grocery store tonight I found myself really thinking about eating off. While at work today I couldn't stop thinking about the block of cheese in the fridge at home. Funny how those thoughts brought on what felt like physical hunger. I would have eaten in the past. I would have finished that entire block of cheese. I would have gotten the gummy worms I wanted. I even had to stop and smell the gummy worms at the store. I can just imagine what that looked like to people walking by. I still look like a fat guy, so they saw a fat guy smelling candy in a store. I am sure I would tell that story to people if I saw that, but I am fine with it. I dealt with my craving in a healthy way.
Getting through these 60 days, and days like today prove to me that I am doing what I need to do. That I have strength I never thought I had. I can keep doing this, and keep figuring out what I need to figure out in order to fix this. I can do this.
-Jon
I have been at this now for 2 months. At least if you count a month as 30 days. I think it is good at this point to look at how far I have gone in that short of a time.
1.) I have lost 66 pounds.
2.) I have come within 11 pounds of my initial goal of 260.
3.) I have not eaten off a single time.
4.) I have gone far down the road to make exercise part of my life.
5.) None of my clothes fit, and even clothes I purchased a month ago no longer fit.
6.) I have more energy than I can remember having.
7.) I have stuck to writing my blog posting and examining myself.
8.) I have found out that I can resist temptation- something I didn't know was in me.
I was going for 10, but ended up with 8. I am ok with that though, that is a huge list even if it is 2 short of 10.
Oddly enough today was a day when I found cravings showing up again. While I was out shopping at the grocery store tonight I found myself really thinking about eating off. While at work today I couldn't stop thinking about the block of cheese in the fridge at home. Funny how those thoughts brought on what felt like physical hunger. I would have eaten in the past. I would have finished that entire block of cheese. I would have gotten the gummy worms I wanted. I even had to stop and smell the gummy worms at the store. I can just imagine what that looked like to people walking by. I still look like a fat guy, so they saw a fat guy smelling candy in a store. I am sure I would tell that story to people if I saw that, but I am fine with it. I dealt with my craving in a healthy way.
Getting through these 60 days, and days like today prove to me that I am doing what I need to do. That I have strength I never thought I had. I can keep doing this, and keep figuring out what I need to figure out in order to fix this. I can do this.
-Jon
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Things I can do now (day 54)
Key Stats: All BG's normal. 4 shakes 1 bar no off eating. 20 minutes on the bike, 20 minute walk, and 30 minutes in the pool.
I feel like my son must have felt when he was learning about what his body could do. I can do all sorts of things I was not able to do 54 days ago. I can make the number 3 with both hands by trapping my pinkie with my thumb. That might sound odd but I could not control my hand enough to do that before. I can sit crossed legged with one knee on top of the other. Don't know why I couldn't do that before, but now I can. I wonder what other new things I will be able to do?
In the exercise world the new things I can do are fairly amazing. I can ride hard for 20 minutes. I can do the elliptical without having to give my arms a rest for 24 minutes. Tonight only the second time in the pool I was able to swim 200 meters without taking a rest. Now I am not swimming fast, or even able to do the same stroke for the entire 200 meters, but I can do it. My walk that I do at lunch used to take me almost exactly 20 minutes, I don't try to walk fast, and now that walk takes me 17 minutes. I'll have to find a new route.
On the walking note, I know I must be going crazy. It was raining hard here almost all day, but when I saw a break in the storm I decided I had better go get my walk in. Now I didn't do that because I wanted to exercise, and I didn't do it because I wanted to lose more weight. I did it because I knew I wouldn't feel right for the rest of the day if I didn't get a walk in. I still have moments in the morning were it is hard to get out of bed. I still fight finishing the time I set on the machine. I still have an internal dialogue and struggle to go do what I need to be doing... but I am winning. It is getting easier to win. More and more it is becoming not just words I say to give myself motivation, instead they are words on conviction- I CAN DO THIS.
-Jon
I feel like my son must have felt when he was learning about what his body could do. I can do all sorts of things I was not able to do 54 days ago. I can make the number 3 with both hands by trapping my pinkie with my thumb. That might sound odd but I could not control my hand enough to do that before. I can sit crossed legged with one knee on top of the other. Don't know why I couldn't do that before, but now I can. I wonder what other new things I will be able to do?
In the exercise world the new things I can do are fairly amazing. I can ride hard for 20 minutes. I can do the elliptical without having to give my arms a rest for 24 minutes. Tonight only the second time in the pool I was able to swim 200 meters without taking a rest. Now I am not swimming fast, or even able to do the same stroke for the entire 200 meters, but I can do it. My walk that I do at lunch used to take me almost exactly 20 minutes, I don't try to walk fast, and now that walk takes me 17 minutes. I'll have to find a new route.
On the walking note, I know I must be going crazy. It was raining hard here almost all day, but when I saw a break in the storm I decided I had better go get my walk in. Now I didn't do that because I wanted to exercise, and I didn't do it because I wanted to lose more weight. I did it because I knew I wouldn't feel right for the rest of the day if I didn't get a walk in. I still have moments in the morning were it is hard to get out of bed. I still fight finishing the time I set on the machine. I still have an internal dialogue and struggle to go do what I need to be doing... but I am winning. It is getting easier to win. More and more it is becoming not just words I say to give myself motivation, instead they are words on conviction- I CAN DO THIS.
-Jon
Thursday, April 4, 2013
Gaining? (day 49)
Key Stats: All BG's normal, 4 shakes 1 bar, no off eating. 30 minutes on the bike, 20 minute walk, and 30 minutes in the pool.
You read that right, gaining. But not weight! No what I am gaining is health. On Monday of this week I did a blood draw to get labs done for my up coming doctors appointment. They did a check of my A1c or more accurately stated my Hemoglobin A1c. You can click on the link if you want a detailed explaination of what this test is, but it boils down to it is basically a check of your average BG or blood glucose, or blood sugar for the past 3 months. Now I have been on this program for 49 days. I stopped taking medicine for my BG around 4 days into the program. So I have been off medicine for 45 days roughly. My A1c prior to starting my weight loss journey was 7.4. 7.4 is a crappy A1c, that meant that my average blood sugar was around 186. A normal person or when I say normal BG up above has a blood sugar between 70-100, or a diabetic person should keep their BG between 80-120 (for the record I don't know why the levels are different, but what ever). So my A1c this time... 5.7. Damn right 5.7. That means my average blood sugar over the past 3 months has been 126. Now I KNOW that the next time I get an A1c done it is going to be even lower. I test in the 70-90 range every time I test. That should put me between 4.2 and 4.7. That means I got a GREAT A1c with over half of the time being measured when I was eating crappy food and not taking care of myself. I am going to add the label to this post right now... WINNING.
So what am I winning? What health am I gaining? Diabetes is a disease of aging. It makes your body get old faster. Plain and simple. Unchecked you can lose limbs from poor circulation. You can lose your eye site, lose feeling in your extremities. It is bad for your kidneys, bad for your heart. It is bad for just about every part of you. It is a shitty disease. The first time I was told I had it I put my head in the sand about it for over a year. I stopped going to that doctor, and didn't do a damned thing. I was in shock over it. I am the guy who didn't get cavities, has never broken a bone, didn't get sick often, and felt that I was invincible. But then, not so much. Then when I finally excepted it, I planned to drop weight and go into remission as fast as I could. That was not what happened. Sure at first I dropped some weight, but I gained it back. Slowly the amount of medicine I needed to stay in decent control climbed and climbed. Until just a few months ago when even on the max dose of Metformin my blood sugar was staying high nearly all the time. I was suppose to get better, but I was not I was getting worse. A few months ago my routine blood screening also said that my kidneys were showing signs of stress. I had to do something. I guess that blood test is the reason I am here. Sure the doctor said it wasn't too high yet, but it was something we needed to keep an eye on. But my body was in the start of falling apart. I am 32 years old, my only living son is 2.5 years old and I felt like at the pace I was going I wouldn't get to see him graduate high school. At his young age he already knows about death because of his twin and his big brother and sister. I didn't want him to know about death because of his dad dying. Not at this age at least. I want to watch him grow up, and get married. I want to be a grandfather. Today I got the confirmation that I am doing what I need to do to make sure that happens. I am going to do everything in my power to never have to take diabetes medicine again. Next to get off my list I hope is blood pressure medicine.
On a some what lighter note, 4 more pounds this week. It is really closer to 6 pounds, but the official scale at the official measuring time gives 4 pounds so that is what I record. That means I am down to 276. Nearly 50 pounds down. I also got in the pool today. My arms are killing me, my abs can feel it, but it felt great. I have always love the feeling of swimming and today was no different. Of course when I was swimming every day I didn't remember muscles feeling this sore. But it will get better. My goal is to start getting into the pool 3 times a week.
The more I go through this program, the more I learn about myself. I have learned that I am able to say no to food. I have learned that I was not always hungry, I just had lots of cravings. I have learned that I can become a "normal" eater. I can do this.
-Jon
You read that right, gaining. But not weight! No what I am gaining is health. On Monday of this week I did a blood draw to get labs done for my up coming doctors appointment. They did a check of my A1c or more accurately stated my Hemoglobin A1c. You can click on the link if you want a detailed explaination of what this test is, but it boils down to it is basically a check of your average BG or blood glucose, or blood sugar for the past 3 months. Now I have been on this program for 49 days. I stopped taking medicine for my BG around 4 days into the program. So I have been off medicine for 45 days roughly. My A1c prior to starting my weight loss journey was 7.4. 7.4 is a crappy A1c, that meant that my average blood sugar was around 186. A normal person or when I say normal BG up above has a blood sugar between 70-100, or a diabetic person should keep their BG between 80-120 (for the record I don't know why the levels are different, but what ever). So my A1c this time... 5.7. Damn right 5.7. That means my average blood sugar over the past 3 months has been 126. Now I KNOW that the next time I get an A1c done it is going to be even lower. I test in the 70-90 range every time I test. That should put me between 4.2 and 4.7. That means I got a GREAT A1c with over half of the time being measured when I was eating crappy food and not taking care of myself. I am going to add the label to this post right now... WINNING.
So what am I winning? What health am I gaining? Diabetes is a disease of aging. It makes your body get old faster. Plain and simple. Unchecked you can lose limbs from poor circulation. You can lose your eye site, lose feeling in your extremities. It is bad for your kidneys, bad for your heart. It is bad for just about every part of you. It is a shitty disease. The first time I was told I had it I put my head in the sand about it for over a year. I stopped going to that doctor, and didn't do a damned thing. I was in shock over it. I am the guy who didn't get cavities, has never broken a bone, didn't get sick often, and felt that I was invincible. But then, not so much. Then when I finally excepted it, I planned to drop weight and go into remission as fast as I could. That was not what happened. Sure at first I dropped some weight, but I gained it back. Slowly the amount of medicine I needed to stay in decent control climbed and climbed. Until just a few months ago when even on the max dose of Metformin my blood sugar was staying high nearly all the time. I was suppose to get better, but I was not I was getting worse. A few months ago my routine blood screening also said that my kidneys were showing signs of stress. I had to do something. I guess that blood test is the reason I am here. Sure the doctor said it wasn't too high yet, but it was something we needed to keep an eye on. But my body was in the start of falling apart. I am 32 years old, my only living son is 2.5 years old and I felt like at the pace I was going I wouldn't get to see him graduate high school. At his young age he already knows about death because of his twin and his big brother and sister. I didn't want him to know about death because of his dad dying. Not at this age at least. I want to watch him grow up, and get married. I want to be a grandfather. Today I got the confirmation that I am doing what I need to do to make sure that happens. I am going to do everything in my power to never have to take diabetes medicine again. Next to get off my list I hope is blood pressure medicine.
On a some what lighter note, 4 more pounds this week. It is really closer to 6 pounds, but the official scale at the official measuring time gives 4 pounds so that is what I record. That means I am down to 276. Nearly 50 pounds down. I also got in the pool today. My arms are killing me, my abs can feel it, but it felt great. I have always love the feeling of swimming and today was no different. Of course when I was swimming every day I didn't remember muscles feeling this sore. But it will get better. My goal is to start getting into the pool 3 times a week.
The more I go through this program, the more I learn about myself. I have learned that I am able to say no to food. I have learned that I was not always hungry, I just had lots of cravings. I have learned that I can become a "normal" eater. I can do this.
-Jon
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Minefield (day 47)
Key Stats: All normal BG's, 4 shakes 1 bar no off eating. 30 min on the bike in the morning, 20 min walk for lunch, 30 min on the bike in the evening.
I was suppose to go swimming today, I am very sad that it didn't work out. I made too many assumptions about what would be ready, and it turns out I was not ready enough to get there on time. I will get to the pool Thursday night. I didn't let that stop me from getting some exercise in tonight though and I rode. It feels good to have exercise be part of the routine and not having to drag myself to do it. I have to find a way to make this part of my life.
The break-room at work has turned into a mine field. We have so much junk food that the table and multiple counters are being used to hold it all. It is down right silly. But I can walk into that room, look at the food, smile about how silly it is, and make my shake or get my water with no internal struggle about eating the food. I can not believe I have been able to get to a point like that were NOT grabbing the junk food and eating feels more normal than the thought of eating the food. And all that in just 47 days. Now I know that this is not a permanent change and I still have a lot to work through to be a "normal" eater, but I am going to put up the winning flag and enjoy it. Sure I still have a long way to go, a lot of work to do, and none of this is going to be easy, but I can do this.
-Jon
I was suppose to go swimming today, I am very sad that it didn't work out. I made too many assumptions about what would be ready, and it turns out I was not ready enough to get there on time. I will get to the pool Thursday night. I didn't let that stop me from getting some exercise in tonight though and I rode. It feels good to have exercise be part of the routine and not having to drag myself to do it. I have to find a way to make this part of my life.
The break-room at work has turned into a mine field. We have so much junk food that the table and multiple counters are being used to hold it all. It is down right silly. But I can walk into that room, look at the food, smile about how silly it is, and make my shake or get my water with no internal struggle about eating the food. I can not believe I have been able to get to a point like that were NOT grabbing the junk food and eating feels more normal than the thought of eating the food. And all that in just 47 days. Now I know that this is not a permanent change and I still have a lot to work through to be a "normal" eater, but I am going to put up the winning flag and enjoy it. Sure I still have a long way to go, a lot of work to do, and none of this is going to be easy, but I can do this.
-Jon
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
4 times (day 27)
Key stats: Morning BG 76, evening BG 83. TONS of walking, no formal exercise. 4 shakes, 1 bar, no off eating.
Not eating off today was harder than it has been in awhile. I had 4 moments when I talked myself into eating off, and then had to talk myself out of it.
1.) Before my presentation. I was nervous about speaking and told myself that some food would make me feel better. So I decided I would have some pizza. But I realized shortly after I decided I could that it would be a bad idea to cheat after this long of doing well.
2.) After my presentation. I did really well, and felt like a rock star, of course that meant I deserved a treat. Some pizza. I realized shortly after that I earned the a treat for sure, but the treat I was going to get was going to be long term health, not short term pleasure.
3.) After the show was wrapping up for the day a social gathering with food was starting. Free food, finger food, awesome looking pasta, roast beef. I said to myself that I should be social and join with what everyone else is doing. Not joining in on the food didn't leave me out of anything though. I don't need to eat or drink to be social.
4.) FREE BOOZE, GOOD FREE BOOZE. All top shelf, great wines, good whiskey, all my favorites. I figured what is one drink, how big of a deal could that be. But I didn't, I drank water. And you know what, I could still just stand around and talk with people.
I just have to wrap this post up with WINNING! and of course, I can do this.
-Jon
Not eating off today was harder than it has been in awhile. I had 4 moments when I talked myself into eating off, and then had to talk myself out of it.
1.) Before my presentation. I was nervous about speaking and told myself that some food would make me feel better. So I decided I would have some pizza. But I realized shortly after I decided I could that it would be a bad idea to cheat after this long of doing well.
2.) After my presentation. I did really well, and felt like a rock star, of course that meant I deserved a treat. Some pizza. I realized shortly after that I earned the a treat for sure, but the treat I was going to get was going to be long term health, not short term pleasure.
3.) After the show was wrapping up for the day a social gathering with food was starting. Free food, finger food, awesome looking pasta, roast beef. I said to myself that I should be social and join with what everyone else is doing. Not joining in on the food didn't leave me out of anything though. I don't need to eat or drink to be social.
4.) FREE BOOZE, GOOD FREE BOOZE. All top shelf, great wines, good whiskey, all my favorites. I figured what is one drink, how big of a deal could that be. But I didn't, I drank water. And you know what, I could still just stand around and talk with people.
I just have to wrap this post up with WINNING! and of course, I can do this.
-Jon
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Being able to help more(day 23)
Key Stats: Morning BG 75. 1 hour on bike in the afternoon. 4 shakes, 1 bar, no off eating.
God I love typing no off eating. I have typed it 23 times in a row. I really think I can go through this entire process and write that every time.
I cooked dinner and lunch for my family today. I used to do the majority of the cooking in the house, but when I started this program I knew I needed to get away from food for awhile. I also did a decent split on the grocery shopping (I think my wife would say she did it more than I did) but I had to step away from that also. I just didn't want to face temptation, because I was worried what I would do. I know this put a bunch of stress on my wife who went from not having to worry about getting food made, and who got to come home from work to a hot meal most every day, to having to deal with all of that herself. I am so glad to have her support in this, I could not do it without her.
It is not that I don't feel temptation, because believe me I do. I however know now that I can deal with the temptation and be successful. I know I can crave a food, or crave a snack and not fall into it. I think it took the week I had on the road to really prove to myself that I can deal with temptation very well. I no longer think about it over and over again. The thought comes up, I put the thought down, and it is over. I am proud of my resolve, and my will. I type it every day on here and maybe at first it was a fake it till you make it phrase. I might still be faking it, but there is no doubt that I am making it. I can do this.
-Jon
God I love typing no off eating. I have typed it 23 times in a row. I really think I can go through this entire process and write that every time.
I cooked dinner and lunch for my family today. I used to do the majority of the cooking in the house, but when I started this program I knew I needed to get away from food for awhile. I also did a decent split on the grocery shopping (I think my wife would say she did it more than I did) but I had to step away from that also. I just didn't want to face temptation, because I was worried what I would do. I know this put a bunch of stress on my wife who went from not having to worry about getting food made, and who got to come home from work to a hot meal most every day, to having to deal with all of that herself. I am so glad to have her support in this, I could not do it without her.
It is not that I don't feel temptation, because believe me I do. I however know now that I can deal with the temptation and be successful. I know I can crave a food, or crave a snack and not fall into it. I think it took the week I had on the road to really prove to myself that I can deal with temptation very well. I no longer think about it over and over again. The thought comes up, I put the thought down, and it is over. I am proud of my resolve, and my will. I type it every day on here and maybe at first it was a fake it till you make it phrase. I might still be faking it, but there is no doubt that I am making it. I can do this.
-Jon
Thursday, March 7, 2013
3 weeks (day 21)
Key stats: Morning BG 72, evening BG 81. 1 hour exercise on the bike in the evening. 4 shakes, 1 bar, no off eating.
I am now 21 days into this program. I have been writing for 22 days. Never missing a day. I have consumed 15,750 calories since starting this program. I have exercised for nearly 20 hours burning around 4800 calories in the process. I have lost 3.5 sizes off of my ring finger. I can see in my face that I have lost weight, people have said they have noticed that I have lost weight. I just don't know at this point how much I have lost.
Today should have been a weigh in day. I should be happily posting how much I have lost in the last week and how much I have lost total since starting. But I am on the road, and I have it in my head that I will only use the official scale to measure my weight loss. So I will have to wait another week before I find out. It will be next week Friday morning before I know.
My first small goal was to be under 300 pounds. I really wanted to hit that last week, but only got to 304. Now I know it was not reasonable to think I could drop 12 pounds two weeks in a row, but hey you have to dream big to achieve big. I am sure that I am under 300 now. I won't celebrate it though until I see it on the scale. After 300 comes the big hurdle of 260. The lowest I can ever remember my weight being was in boot camp when I weighed in at 254 or so. So 6 pounds above my lowest remembered adult weight just seems unreal to me in so many ways. But the way I am losing pounds and the way I am able to continue doing what I need to do encourages me. I don't know what my final weight goal is going to be, but I do know that I can do this.
-Jon
I am now 21 days into this program. I have been writing for 22 days. Never missing a day. I have consumed 15,750 calories since starting this program. I have exercised for nearly 20 hours burning around 4800 calories in the process. I have lost 3.5 sizes off of my ring finger. I can see in my face that I have lost weight, people have said they have noticed that I have lost weight. I just don't know at this point how much I have lost.
Today should have been a weigh in day. I should be happily posting how much I have lost in the last week and how much I have lost total since starting. But I am on the road, and I have it in my head that I will only use the official scale to measure my weight loss. So I will have to wait another week before I find out. It will be next week Friday morning before I know.
My first small goal was to be under 300 pounds. I really wanted to hit that last week, but only got to 304. Now I know it was not reasonable to think I could drop 12 pounds two weeks in a row, but hey you have to dream big to achieve big. I am sure that I am under 300 now. I won't celebrate it though until I see it on the scale. After 300 comes the big hurdle of 260. The lowest I can ever remember my weight being was in boot camp when I weighed in at 254 or so. So 6 pounds above my lowest remembered adult weight just seems unreal to me in so many ways. But the way I am losing pounds and the way I am able to continue doing what I need to do encourages me. I don't know what my final weight goal is going to be, but I do know that I can do this.
-Jon
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
First Day on the road (day 19)
Key stats: Morning BG 78, evening BG 82. 30 minutes on the bike in the morning, 30 minutes on the elliptical in the afternoon. 4 shakes, 1 bar, no off eating.
Being on the road is harder than being at home. I can stop and get food, or eat what ever I want when I want and no one will see me do it. At home my wife will notice if I order a large pizza for dinner. On the road no notice. So today it came down 100% to will power.
I am proud of myself, because will all that above, and a bunch of stress added in, I stayed on plan. Even when I had to stop at the local gas station/ car repair/ tire center/ grocery store/ BBQ joint/ general store (not kidding it is all of those things) to get a flat tire fixed (after blowing out a tire on a mountain top for the SECOND time) I stayed on plan. When walking past the hotel bar/restaurant and seeing tasty food, I walked past to the exercise room and stayed on plan.
I don't want all the temptation, and I hope at some point it is not such an internal struggle to eat right... I know one thing. I can do this.
-Jon
Being on the road is harder than being at home. I can stop and get food, or eat what ever I want when I want and no one will see me do it. At home my wife will notice if I order a large pizza for dinner. On the road no notice. So today it came down 100% to will power.
I am proud of myself, because will all that above, and a bunch of stress added in, I stayed on plan. Even when I had to stop at the local gas station/ car repair/ tire center/ grocery store/ BBQ joint/ general store (not kidding it is all of those things) to get a flat tire fixed (after blowing out a tire on a mountain top for the SECOND time) I stayed on plan. When walking past the hotel bar/restaurant and seeing tasty food, I walked past to the exercise room and stayed on plan.
I don't want all the temptation, and I hope at some point it is not such an internal struggle to eat right... I know one thing. I can do this.
-Jon
Monday, March 4, 2013
Leaving on a Jet plane (day 18)
Key Stats: Morning BG 73. 1 hour exercise in the morning on the bike, 4 shakes, 1 bar, no off eating.
You'll have to excuse the short post, it is late and I need to be up early.
Today was not an easy day. Having to pack all my food, carry it through an airport, make shakes in the airport, oh and resist temptation. But I did it. I got to VA with no cheating, safe and sound, and still strong on the program. I wish I could say the same for my bags. I had to do a stop at Walmart at 10:30 PM before I checked into my hotel so that I could get underwear, socks, and of course some exercise clothes. I am not going to let not having my bags stop me from achieving my goal. I can do this.
-Jon
You'll have to excuse the short post, it is late and I need to be up early.
Today was not an easy day. Having to pack all my food, carry it through an airport, make shakes in the airport, oh and resist temptation. But I did it. I got to VA with no cheating, safe and sound, and still strong on the program. I wish I could say the same for my bags. I had to do a stop at Walmart at 10:30 PM before I checked into my hotel so that I could get underwear, socks, and of course some exercise clothes. I am not going to let not having my bags stop me from achieving my goal. I can do this.
-Jon
Sunday, March 3, 2013
Getting Packed (day 17)
Key Stats: No BG checks, 1 hour exercise on the bike in the afternoon, 4 shakes, 1 bar, no off eating.
Went to another birthday party again today. Got to face a nice looking cheese platter, cupcakes, and all sorts of other tasty looking things. I have to add the winning tag to this post because, WINNING! I didn't have to fight temptation, I didn't feel like I missed out. I did great.
I am getting packed tonight for my first trip since I started this diet. Things on my packing list include shirts, pants, boxers, socks, work out clothes, and all my food for the entire time. I've packed for a number of trips in the past, but I have never had to bring work out clothes or all of my food. That just feels weird to say. My entire weeks worth of food fits in a small carry on bag. It might just fit in my lap top bag so I won't have to carry two bags on. Wow.
I am going to miss out on class though. That is going to be hard. I am just getting into the groove of this diet, and I have learned about myself at each class. I wish I didn't have to miss. I know I'll be fine though. After all I can do this.
-Jon
Went to another birthday party again today. Got to face a nice looking cheese platter, cupcakes, and all sorts of other tasty looking things. I have to add the winning tag to this post because, WINNING! I didn't have to fight temptation, I didn't feel like I missed out. I did great.
I am getting packed tonight for my first trip since I started this diet. Things on my packing list include shirts, pants, boxers, socks, work out clothes, and all my food for the entire time. I've packed for a number of trips in the past, but I have never had to bring work out clothes or all of my food. That just feels weird to say. My entire weeks worth of food fits in a small carry on bag. It might just fit in my lap top bag so I won't have to carry two bags on. Wow.
I am going to miss out on class though. That is going to be hard. I am just getting into the groove of this diet, and I have learned about myself at each class. I wish I didn't have to miss. I know I'll be fine though. After all I can do this.
-Jon
Thursday, February 28, 2013
8 is great (day 14)
Key stats: Morning BG 85, Afternoon BG 73. 30 min in bike in the evening, snow in the morning. 4 shakes, 1 bar. 8 pounds down for the week.
I lost 8 pounds! That makes 20 pounds in two weeks on the VLCD program, and 33 total pounds since I decided recently to lose weight. If you track back to the first time I recorded my weight with the idea of losing weight it means 51 pounds lost. I am proud of myself.
I missed out on a half hour of my exercise today. Taking care of the snow certainly is activity, but I want to get back into my routine of exercise. I think I am going to try to stick to 30 minutes in the morning, a 20 minute walk at lunch, and 30 minutes in the evening. I had wanted and set my timer to one hour tonight on the bike, but decided to try and get back on a schedule. I doubted my self and thought I was just making an excuse to not ride for an hour, but stuck to it. A schedule really would be better for me as I need to get on auto-pilot for awhile.
Class was good tonight too. We talked about long term weight, and keeping the pounds we lose off. I realized that my previous weight losses were really doomed from the start. I had the intention of losing weight, not the intention of being at a healthy weight for the rest of my life. Each other time I dropped the pounds and thought I was done. I really see now that this is going to be something I can't ignore for the rest of my life. It might get easier with time, but as I look back on my life going all the way back to 1st grade (the first time I remember noticing I was fat), I am not able to not think about what food I eat. I will need to be a thoughtful eater forever if I want this to work. Dropping weight is easy, I can do that. Can I do the rest of it?
-Jon
I lost 8 pounds! That makes 20 pounds in two weeks on the VLCD program, and 33 total pounds since I decided recently to lose weight. If you track back to the first time I recorded my weight with the idea of losing weight it means 51 pounds lost. I am proud of myself.
I missed out on a half hour of my exercise today. Taking care of the snow certainly is activity, but I want to get back into my routine of exercise. I think I am going to try to stick to 30 minutes in the morning, a 20 minute walk at lunch, and 30 minutes in the evening. I had wanted and set my timer to one hour tonight on the bike, but decided to try and get back on a schedule. I doubted my self and thought I was just making an excuse to not ride for an hour, but stuck to it. A schedule really would be better for me as I need to get on auto-pilot for awhile.
Class was good tonight too. We talked about long term weight, and keeping the pounds we lose off. I realized that my previous weight losses were really doomed from the start. I had the intention of losing weight, not the intention of being at a healthy weight for the rest of my life. Each other time I dropped the pounds and thought I was done. I really see now that this is going to be something I can't ignore for the rest of my life. It might get easier with time, but as I look back on my life going all the way back to 1st grade (the first time I remember noticing I was fat), I am not able to not think about what food I eat. I will need to be a thoughtful eater forever if I want this to work. Dropping weight is easy, I can do that. Can I do the rest of it?
-Jon
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Forgetting to eat(day 12)
Key Stats: Morning BG 73, Evening BG 70. 30 minutes on the bike in the morning, 20 minute walk at lunch, 30 minutes on the bike in the evening. 4 shakes 1 bar, no off eating.
I missed a shake today. I was super busy at work, and when my alarm went off to eat I didn't have time to go make the shake. I didn't notice that I had forgotten until I was packing up to go home. I was surprised that I wasn't hungry. I don't know if it was all in my head though, but temptation reared its ugly head when I got home. Plus I think I went too long between eating as I was starting to loss energy and started to feel crappy. I have to make sure to not skip meals like that again. I think most of it was in my head, but it is what it is.
But today was still a good day, after all I faced temptation and won. I'll post the winning tag on this email for sure. We had cookies at the company meeting, some bags of chips got left on the kitchen table free for the taking, and some one put a bunch of left over valentines candies on the table. I could have taken any of these and enjoyed them. I didn't.
I can do this.
-Jon
I missed a shake today. I was super busy at work, and when my alarm went off to eat I didn't have time to go make the shake. I didn't notice that I had forgotten until I was packing up to go home. I was surprised that I wasn't hungry. I don't know if it was all in my head though, but temptation reared its ugly head when I got home. Plus I think I went too long between eating as I was starting to loss energy and started to feel crappy. I have to make sure to not skip meals like that again. I think most of it was in my head, but it is what it is.
But today was still a good day, after all I faced temptation and won. I'll post the winning tag on this email for sure. We had cookies at the company meeting, some bags of chips got left on the kitchen table free for the taking, and some one put a bunch of left over valentines candies on the table. I could have taken any of these and enjoyed them. I didn't.
I can do this.
-Jon
Sunday, February 24, 2013
Committed (day 10)
Key Stats: Lunch BG: 72, Dinner BG: 84. 30 minutes on the bike in the morning, 55 minutes on the bike in the evening. 4 shakes, 1 bar, no off eating.
Today was a good day for me. I felt stronger than I have in a few days. I got to face, and over come 2 big challenges for me.
Challenge one: While going to get my ring re-sized (apparently all of my weight was in my ring finger because my ring simply falls off when I try and put it on now) I had to face Andes Mints. I love those. I put a link back there to a 5 pound bag of them. I am certain I could eat that bag in a day while at work. Again, no one would have notices, no one would have found out, but I wasn't even really all that tempted. I got my ring turned in to be re-sized and walked out.
Challenge two: Easter candy is here. Creme eggs, Starburst Jelly beans... I can not eat too many of those. I really don't know if I would have a limit to how many of them I could eat. Again I saw them, acknowledged what I could have done, or would have done, and moved on.
The title of the post is committed and it really rung true today. When I got married my ring size was 18. We could barely find a place that had the sizers to make a ring that size. Now that my ring is falling off I tried to find a temporary sizer for it to make it so that it fit. So I took the ring into Kesslers were we purchased it from, and it turns out they did not have a temporary size that could drop the ring size down to a 14.5. That is right, I have dropped 3.5 sizes from my ring finger. I had no idea that would happen, or could happen. So I had to send the ring in to be resized. That now leaves me so that if I gain the weight I have lost back, I will not have a ring to wear. This is I am sure the first of many getting too small for things I own, but it is also the hardest to change. I hate not wearing my ring, and I would hate to have to bring it in to make it bigger again. I can do this.
-Jon
Today was a good day for me. I felt stronger than I have in a few days. I got to face, and over come 2 big challenges for me.
Challenge one: While going to get my ring re-sized (apparently all of my weight was in my ring finger because my ring simply falls off when I try and put it on now) I had to face Andes Mints. I love those. I put a link back there to a 5 pound bag of them. I am certain I could eat that bag in a day while at work. Again, no one would have notices, no one would have found out, but I wasn't even really all that tempted. I got my ring turned in to be re-sized and walked out.
Challenge two: Easter candy is here. Creme eggs, Starburst Jelly beans... I can not eat too many of those. I really don't know if I would have a limit to how many of them I could eat. Again I saw them, acknowledged what I could have done, or would have done, and moved on.
The title of the post is committed and it really rung true today. When I got married my ring size was 18. We could barely find a place that had the sizers to make a ring that size. Now that my ring is falling off I tried to find a temporary sizer for it to make it so that it fit. So I took the ring into Kesslers were we purchased it from, and it turns out they did not have a temporary size that could drop the ring size down to a 14.5. That is right, I have dropped 3.5 sizes from my ring finger. I had no idea that would happen, or could happen. So I had to send the ring in to be resized. That now leaves me so that if I gain the weight I have lost back, I will not have a ring to wear. This is I am sure the first of many getting too small for things I own, but it is also the hardest to change. I hate not wearing my ring, and I would hate to have to bring it in to make it bigger again. I can do this.
-Jon
Saturday, February 23, 2013
Keeping motivation (day 9)
Key Stats: BG-94. I forgot my meter at work. Exercise 1 hour on the bike... 1 hour in a row never done that before. 4 shakes, 1 bar, no off eating.
I got back on track with my motivation today. I had let success almost be my downfall, but decided that was a really bad idea. So I woke up early and got my ride in. Eat on my schedule, and did was I needed to do.
I also got to face 2 sets of temptations for me today. The first was during lunch, we had to eat on the road so we stopped at a McDees. That place smells like happiness. At one point my wife and son got up to take a potty break leaving behind both meals. I could have snagged a french fry and no one would have noticed. I could have taken a small bite of a cheese burger completely unnoticed. I did neither of those two things. Certainly the thought came to mind, and I had to tell myself no, but I didn't do it. Will there be a time when those thoughts don't come to mind?
The second temptation test was stopping at a gas station to get my wife juice and food to treat a low BG she was having. They made me walk through an isle of doughnuts, cookies, and treats to check out. It made me smile to think about it. Here I was a fat man laughing about the absurdity of having to walk through an isle of treats to check out, thinking they had set that isle up just for me. Oh that isle would have worked just 10 days ago, but today it just made me laugh. To quote Charlie Sheen "WINNING!" I can do this.
-Jon
I got back on track with my motivation today. I had let success almost be my downfall, but decided that was a really bad idea. So I woke up early and got my ride in. Eat on my schedule, and did was I needed to do.
I also got to face 2 sets of temptations for me today. The first was during lunch, we had to eat on the road so we stopped at a McDees. That place smells like happiness. At one point my wife and son got up to take a potty break leaving behind both meals. I could have snagged a french fry and no one would have noticed. I could have taken a small bite of a cheese burger completely unnoticed. I did neither of those two things. Certainly the thought came to mind, and I had to tell myself no, but I didn't do it. Will there be a time when those thoughts don't come to mind?
The second temptation test was stopping at a gas station to get my wife juice and food to treat a low BG she was having. They made me walk through an isle of doughnuts, cookies, and treats to check out. It made me smile to think about it. Here I was a fat man laughing about the absurdity of having to walk through an isle of treats to check out, thinking they had set that isle up just for me. Oh that isle would have worked just 10 days ago, but today it just made me laugh. To quote Charlie Sheen "WINNING!" I can do this.
-Jon
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